Remember What I Told You

..
Why are you staring back at me with those eyes?

filled with unshed tears,

filled with untold fears.

This is what you wanted,right?

A taste of short bliss,

A peek of yesterday you’ve missed.

Stop staring at me like that, will you?

Stop telling me I never once told you.

Because I did.

But you didn’t listen.

You didn’t care.

All you wanted was a sad story to share.

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My Angel’s Guitar

To My Angel,

The sky slowly turns red now..

See the rays of the sun? It reminds me of you. It’s warmth through the cold breeze makes me feel your hug. It’s nearly twilight now and I’m waiting for the sunset.

I wouldn’t forget the day we became friends. At this exact place, I almost killed myself. Few more inches and I could have ended my misery with a blade. To my surprise, someone took it from me. You just came out of nowhere and started scolding me. I was literally silent, dumbfounded by that grand entrance of yours that I couldn’t remember if I was still breathing at that moment. But there’s this line you’ve said that I’d never forget,

“There’s someone out there who prays desperately just to prolong his life yet someone like you would just throw away that precious gift.”

I thought it only happens in movies. Funny how it happened that day. It made me laugh bitterly and I saw confusion written all over your face. Right at that moment, I thanked you silently. I was such an ungrateful creature. Next thing I knew, I was crying so hard, not minding the fact that I’m weeping in front of a stranger.

I was expecting you to leave me there. You must have thought that I was some kind of an insane girl who cries after laughing. But you stayed. You waited til I have no more tears to shed. You introduced yourself. You know what? Your name became the most beautiful name for me, Kielle. I told you how miserable my life was. My parents just got divorced, leaving me alone with grandma. They don’t love me anymore. They never did anyway. You just smiled and offered to sing for me. I knew what you were trying to say, of course. My problem was of no difference with others’. It’s not as if my parents are the only couple to go through that kind of decision. You sang till you saw me smile.  You had no idea how it made me feel so much better. Since then, we’ve always hang out here. You’d sing, I’d listen and we’d both wait for the sun to set.

Since that day, twilight became my favorite time of the day. This place became my sanctuary. The sound of cold zephyr and birds’ melody became Continue reading

One Last Hug

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“Can I hug you?”

It came like a whisper, but it lingered in my ear.

I slowly turned to him, confusion written all over my face. I waited for more words, but it never came. He was busy with his sketch pad, careful with every stroke he did with his pen.

He was facing me, but I could’t see what he was drawing. I mentally sighed and told myself that it was either he was talking with his pen or I just heard him wrong. I think it’s the latter.

We’ve already spent two hours sitting under a big tree. He said he just wanted some company while he draws. Without second thoughts, I agreed to walk with him until we reached a mini park on a hill by the sea.

There were swings but he chose to sit on the big roots of the tree. I just followed.

He was acting weird today. He’s always been loud but today he’s been unusually quiet. I didn’t mind though.

I just wanted to be with him.

For it might be the last.

“Aren’t you done yet with that?”

I asked him impatiently, trying to grab the sketch pad from his hold but he swiftly took it away from my sight while laughing at my attempt.

“Are you sure you wanted company? It didn’t seem like I’m wanted here, you know.” I said with a pout while pointing at myself.

Again, he just smiled and ruffled my hair. I frowned at him as I try to fix my now unruly hair.

“Wow, thanks for trying to style my hair. It’s a mess though” I told him sarcastically as I turned my back at him.

I just focused on the waves and birds doing a show in front of me.

If he’s not going to talk to me, then it’s better to suit myself with beautiful things.

“Can I hug you?”

There goes my imagination. I’m starting to hear things again.

“Can I hug you?”

La la la la, what the hell is wrong with my ears today?

“Can I hug you?”

Maybe it’s the wind, or the birds perhaps?

Something then landed on my lap, and all I did is stare at

it.

Wow.

It’s me. It’s my face. Me facing the sea, sitting on a big root, with sunrays striking my face..

He just drew a picture of me.

“Can I hug you?”

This time, I looked at him. He’s smiling again.

“Think of it as your graduation gift for me. Can you do that?”

He’s smiling.

But his sad eyes tell me he’s feeling the other way around.

Why would he want to hug me all of the sudden?

Then it hit me.

It might be the last.

I gave him my most genuine smile and spread my arms. Without me answering, he already knew what it meant.

We hugged for God knows how long.

I felt so heavy, but I didn’t cry, I didn’t frown.

All I did is hold him in my arms as tight as I could.

Even if it would be the last.

Even if it would be our one last hug.

Lost Stars

..
Both of us are stars.

But we’re made from two different skies.

So we wouldn’t collide,
So we’d always seem to hide

from each other,
We’d never have a single light year to shine on each other’s life,

Nor share gases of tears with each other’s dying night.

We’re nothing but a speck of dust in the galaxy,

And one day we’d just face our end,
And one day we’d just wake up to this reality.

I Saw Him Today

I saw him today.

I silently wished he would stop sending me messages, or greeting me every time we’ve bumped into each other. It was granted.

But I saw him today.

It was long ago, and I haven’t seen him for at least a month until today.

But I saw him today.

It’s been ages ago. He was my enemy, but I let him intrude my life. He even became my friend. He became a part of my story. But that day came, and all my fears came to life. He, who meant laughter suddenly became a paint of pain in my white canvass.

I decided to stay away, keep my distance and build a wall he would never have a chance to break.

Because I know he would never stay that long. He’ll just go one day and it would only leave me scars.

I was selfish, I know. But he was more than selfish than I was.

He gave me nothing but false happiness. His empty words left me thinking. And thinking. And thinking…

But I saw him today.

So what if he’s there standing just outside our window pane?

He’s there. I saw him. He saw me.

And it ends there.

Blank Papers

 

I was on my way home when I saw a girl,

On a swing singing a sad song.

Letting her tears flow as free as a fall,

Like she doesn’t care if it hurts anymore.

She then stood up, took a few painful steps,

and I saw myself following every step she takes

then she opened a door, I followed her.

She’s now in her room, everything’s in a blur.

She stared long at that blank paper,

With a pen on top of it.

She then started scribbling words I could hardly decipher,

and whispered all her fears.

“When will I have a happy family?

When will they stop fighting?”

she asked the Almigthy.

Now I know who she is,

She’s that little girl I used to be.

EUPHORIC DROPS

Half the world hates thee,

And desperately wishes not to see

Half cries as you start to fall,

As if you’ve heard that grief they’ve called.

Surprisingly, I don’t feel the same

Don’t keep an eye on me; I’m not to be blamed

Weird as it may seem, I’d like to hear

That hauntingly ethereal melody; with no fear.

Each brave drop when it meets the ground,

Or when it flows down the sea it has found

I’d like to dance as it makes that beat

A cry of pain and bliss, a whistle it perfectly fit.

Euphoric drops, you come so right

You equally shine like the sun so bright

A gray-filled cloud and I start to glow

A little more patience, then you start to flow.

Heed my call, cry a little more

Show some lament and mirth, it’s what I ask for

Plok, plok, or pitter, patter

What shall I call you, or does it even matter?

Just come and fill my day

Wash away fears, show me the way

To solve this eternal puzzle I made

The one I’ve lost track, blue’s clues fade.